Two blondes with hammers, Carol and Donna, were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity house.Carol, who was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail, and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in. Donna, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, ‘Why are [...]
A man & wife are in bed.He farts & shouts ”Goal.”His wife farts & shouts ”One all.” When the score gets to two all,the man strains so hard he craps the bed. His wife says ”What the hell was that?” ”Half time – swap sides.”
Ol’ Fred had been a faithful Christian and was in the hospital, near death.The family called their pastor to stand with them. As the pastor stood next to the bed, Ol’ Fred’s condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on. The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece [...]
Five Surgeons are discussing the types of people they like to operate on. The first surgeon says: “I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.” The second responds: “Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded.” The third surgeon says: [...]
The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, “You’re charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer.”A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, “You b*stard!” The judge says, “You’re also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer.” The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, “You [...]
